Let’s be honest, we all wonder what men are really thinking when it comes to dating and relationships, but sometimes we can never really tell.
We spoke with guys who are all in different stages in their lives to help us answer the questions you may not be able to ask them yourselves. Hopefully their responses bring some clarity to your situation – it’s always interesting to get an unbiased perspective!
The Guy Who Is Married With Kids
Question: If someone says “I love you” first after a night of drinking, does it count?
Answer: Yes. I believe the truth comes out when you drink in regard to the emotion of love. You can really tell whether someone loves you or hates you. The way it comes out is a different story sometimes you can say terrible things to someone when you’re drunk which can mean you actually love them and vice versa but if you say you love them, it definitely counts.
Question: When do you stop telling your guy friends details about the girl you’re seeing?
Answer: Never. I tell my friends everything. The real question is when do they stop listening?
The Guy In His First Year Of Marriage
Question: How did you know when it was appropriate to take the next step?
Answer: When I wanted to move in together. I always knew I wanted to move in with my wife before marrying her even if this broke from “tradition”. Moving in with someone is the best way to really get to know them. Once I started to think about marriage, I knew it was time to move in together.
Question: What’s the bigger step? Moving in or getting married?
Answer: Moving in.
The Guy In A Serious Relationship
Question: If she’s ready for the next step and you’re not, do you end it right away or try to keep it going and see?
Answer: If you can see yourself eventually getting to the stage she’s at, just ask her to be patient. As long as she has the reassurance that you see yourself with her down the road…hopefully she is ok with that. Just don’t take advantage of her patience.
Question: Who should say “I love you” first? Guy or girl?
Answer: I think the guy should. BUT….if the girl really feels it prior to the guy saying it, she shouldn’t hold out just on principle. Go for it.
The Single Guy
Question: How long into dating/ a relationship does it take for you to know what it’s going to be, like a summer fling, just hooking up, the one, etc.?
Answer: I don’t think the actual amount of days/weeks/months matters in the beginning of things. It’s more about how many times you see each other and if you are seeing each other consecutively. There can be situations where it’s like 5 consecutive days of hanging out and then on day 6 when you are finally not hanging out it’s like, “Oh I got used to her, how’d that happen, I want her to come back, no one else can have her.” If you go on dates super inconsistently, especially if you are bad at keeping in touch over text like me, you might never have clarity into the situation.
Question: What does the “honeymoon phase” of a relationship mean to you?
Answer: The honeymoon phase, to me, is the realest thing ever. It’s the time where there is an understanding that you both have feelings for each other. Nothing else matters. Neither one of you can do no wrong. It’s the time where you don’t care or don’t notice the weird traits, physically or personality-based, in the other person. The honeymoon phase is a great time in any relationship. It’s great until it isn’t. Out of nowhere the things you loved about the person start to bother you and you start to bicker. Once the honeymoon phase is over, it’s hard to achieve that special honeymoon feelings again until there is a major renewing shared experience.